Marital Conflict: How to Deal with it - Counselors Marital Conflict: How to Deal with it - Counselors

Marital Conflict: How to Deal with it

Yes, marital conflicts happen. So, while it may have negative undertones to it, not all conflict is bad. Some level of conflict can be healthy for every relationship.

People see conflict as a problem in a relationship. But conflicts essentially shed light on the problems that already exist between people. These help people understand that something is not working between two people and that they need to work together to address the situation.

These conflicts even encourage healthy communication. And through good communication, couples get to convey their emotions and needs to their partners. This ultimately improves the quality of every marriage.

Too Much Conflict Is Another Story

While some form of conflict is healthy and often necessary, too much of it can be dangerous for any relationship. An unhealthy conflict occurs when the conflict happens too often and for the same reasons, which leads to resentment instead of solutions. This can also stem from a lack of communication or violating one’s trust in any way.

Too much friction can kill any relationship, including marriages. Badly handled conflicts are one of the main reasons why married couples separate. With that, marital conflicts can, in a way, influence the fate of a marriage. Of course, the result has a lot to do with how couples handle said conflict. 

Dealing with Marital Conflict

Marital conflict between a couple.

Marital conflict may hold more weight than conflicts in other types of relationships. This is because marriage is not only a representation of the commitment of two individuals. It is often a binding contract that has legal ramifications. Let’s look at the best ways how to navigate marital conflict.


Communicate. Communicate

This cannot be stressed enough. Good communication can go a long way when it comes to marital conflicts. This ensures that both thoughts of each side are verbalized and expressed. Communicating can help them ease their frustrations over the conflict.

But communicating can be emotionally stimulating. This can cause feelings to escalate, which can then cause the conflict to intensify. Because of this, couples should not only know how to communicate openly, but they should also learn how to handle emotionally charged conversations.


Listening Is Part of Communicating

Many people only see communicating as a one-way process. You express your thoughts and emotions, and that’s it. But couples should understand and mutually that good communication needs listening too.

Individuals in marriages should also learn how to acknowledge the thoughts and emotions of their partners. This makes them feel understood. Apart from that, it is also a critical step in coming up with solutions and ideas to solve their conflicts.

Coming Up with Solutions

Coming up with good solutions to every marital problem can be a long process. It will take thorough communication and brainstorming. As they go through this process, couples need social support. They can get this from their friends, relatives, or even each other.

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Taking The Step Towards a Solution

Once a solution has been agreed upon, couples need to act on it. After all, it’s useless to have solutions and not do anything about it. So, couples need to work together once again to repair or improve their current situation, even if it’s not easy to do.

Some require compromising to meet a certain goal. This can be hard as it requires some form of sacrifice from both parties. With that, couples should keep in mind that they are taking these steps for a fruitful marriage.



Once married couples figure out their resolution process and commit to doing their part, they can sort out any solvable conflict. Marriage is never easy. The challenges are countless and conflict is always assured. But with the right mindset and dedication, couples can live a truly fruitful and productive marriage.

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