Teenagers living in excessive fear

Parents sought counseling for their teenage daughter who was struggling to be successful with her grades at school. They said that she had been spending a significant time alone in her room and had been displaying angry outbursts. She had also stopped wanting to participate in extra-curricular activities that she once loved and excelled at. She said she was getting lots of headaches and stomach aches and that it was too hard to do anything. The parents expected that the teen years could be up and down; however, they reached out for help when they noticed her overall change in mood and the increasing isolation from family and friends. The teen told her parents that she did not want to talk to them about what she was feeling or thinking. The teen was no longer active in her extra-curricular activities or hanging out with friends. The parents were worried and frustrated that their daughter seemed like she was not even trying and they were uncertain if they should discipline her or expect less from her. There was no known reason for the headaches and stomach pain

The psychologist met with the parents initially to discuss their perspectives, and concerns & answered their questions. Also obtained info about their daughter’s growth & developmental stages from birth to present and any issues or concerns along the way (ex: peers, coping with stress, etc). Psychologists discussed the normal challenges and tasks of adolescence. They were advised to see a  Dr. rule out any physical health concerns that might have contributed to the headaches, stomach pain, or mood changes.

We facilitated parent-child sessions for the family to discuss topics related to feelings and family dynamics. The teen gained awareness that she had been trying to cope with excessive fear for a long time and that it had gotten to the point that she couldn’t stop the noise of the negative thoughts from impacting her self-esteem. She learned strategies to cope with anxiety (turning down the noise of perfection) and learned words to express her feelings/thoughts; as well as, when and how to ask for support. The parents affirmed that their daughter wanted their support but hadn’t known how to ask or what to ask for. The family gained an increased understanding of one another, and ideas of how to support each other, and grew stronger, as a result.

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